Gurl PowR!
"Hey," you say with as much friendliness as you can, even though the girl becomes more repulsive the closer you get to her. Her unruly curly hair is stuffed into some ponytail-like catastrophe, she's wearing an oversized tee-shirt with bold lettering proclaiming WoW! on the back, and she's got on what are probably her older brother's jeans over a pair of Converse. She smells vaguely of sweat, lint and electricity.
She jumps nearly a mile back when she sees you there, in all your fashionable and fabulous fashionabulousness.
"Uh, hi," she says guardedly.
Dead giveaway. She was the girl in high school that a girl like you would never have bothered talking to. In fact, you might even have been mean to her. But you're so past all that now.
"So you like maxi pads, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess," she titters nervously.
"Not like it's any of my business, but honey you're mistreating yourself. Tampons are the way to go."
"Well, I can't really use tampons."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm a virgin." She says this quietly, but with a kind of candor that you find absolutely appalling. You haven't been a virgin since you-can't-remember-when. If, heaven forbid, you still were, you would not announce such a shameful fact to a stranger. She just stares at you blankly, like Bessie the Cow chewing her cud.
"Oh," you manage to say, now completely flustered by your encounter with Ms. Frumpy. Some people are hopeless and simply can't be rescued from their drab, frumpy and sexless lives. You feel your cheeks turning a little hot. You have to come out of this on top. You come out of everything on top. Well, except when Garrett's involved, but your mind is wandering...
"Do you have a boyfriend?" you ask quickly after a little pause.
"Yeah, I have a boyfriend," she responds flatly.
"Does he play lots of videogames?"
"Yeah," she says, pushing her glasses up her wide greasy face.
"Well maybe you should tell him that real girls give better head than spell-casting gnomes."
"Um, ok "
"Just a suggestion, sweetie. And when he does get around to it, you can move onto these, the ones used by women who know." You point towards your beloved Super-Absorbencies. You make sure to smirk audibly as you push past the little shame to femininity. You can just see the headlines in a few weeks: Girl Dies of Toxic Shock Syndrome After Leaving Tampon in for 40 Days! Excessive Gaming may be to Blame for Lack of Hygiene You laugh a little to yourself and shake yo' thang all the way to the counter.
Standing at the register, you see a dark figure out of the corner of your eye. An instinctive glance backward sends an immediate dagger of icy fear down your spine. Oh no! This is a a
She jumps nearly a mile back when she sees you there, in all your fashionable and fabulous fashionabulousness.
"Uh, hi," she says guardedly.
Dead giveaway. She was the girl in high school that a girl like you would never have bothered talking to. In fact, you might even have been mean to her. But you're so past all that now.
"So you like maxi pads, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess," she titters nervously.
"Not like it's any of my business, but honey you're mistreating yourself. Tampons are the way to go."
"Well, I can't really use tampons."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm a virgin." She says this quietly, but with a kind of candor that you find absolutely appalling. You haven't been a virgin since you-can't-remember-when. If, heaven forbid, you still were, you would not announce such a shameful fact to a stranger. She just stares at you blankly, like Bessie the Cow chewing her cud.
"Oh," you manage to say, now completely flustered by your encounter with Ms. Frumpy. Some people are hopeless and simply can't be rescued from their drab, frumpy and sexless lives. You feel your cheeks turning a little hot. You have to come out of this on top. You come out of everything on top. Well, except when Garrett's involved, but your mind is wandering...
"Do you have a boyfriend?" you ask quickly after a little pause.
"Yeah, I have a boyfriend," she responds flatly.
"Does he play lots of videogames?"
"Yeah," she says, pushing her glasses up her wide greasy face.
"Well maybe you should tell him that real girls give better head than spell-casting gnomes."
"Um, ok "
"Just a suggestion, sweetie. And when he does get around to it, you can move onto these, the ones used by women who know." You point towards your beloved Super-Absorbencies. You make sure to smirk audibly as you push past the little shame to femininity. You can just see the headlines in a few weeks: Girl Dies of Toxic Shock Syndrome After Leaving Tampon in for 40 Days! Excessive Gaming may be to Blame for Lack of Hygiene You laugh a little to yourself and shake yo' thang all the way to the counter.
Standing at the register, you see a dark figure out of the corner of your eye. An instinctive glance backward sends an immediate dagger of icy fear down your spine. Oh no! This is a a