Hall of Infinite Doors

You can't stand to wait any longer. You run over to the empty house with the luscious garden and practically dive into the sugary flowerbed.

This is better than anything you have ever eaten! Oh yes! Sugary goodness. Sweet, soft, supple, melt-in-your mouth goodness! Before you know it, the entire flowerbed is gone, leaving just a swirled multi-color stain on the ground where it once stood. Maybe you overdid it a little. You suddenly feel nervous. And your stomach is beginning to hurt. You pick yourself up from all fours and are about to dart around the side of the house and take cover when you hear a voice shout,

"Hold it right there!"

Instinctively, you thrust your arms over your head and squeal, "Please don't hurt me!"

You hear heavy steps crunching through the snow. An imposing figure dressed in a fine red soldier's uniform, complete with golden epaulettes on each shoulder, appears before you. He is wearing a tall hat that matches his uniform and fine silken white gloves. An impressive beard hangs from his chin, and you notice that his light blue eyes are fixed rigidly on you.

"Who are you?" he suddenly bellows. "And what are you doing eating Mrs. Hubbard's garden?" When he speaks, his mouth opens directly down and snaps back up with a little popping sound. He has two rows of perfectly white, straight teeth.

"I was hungry," you plead.

"I don't care! Thievery is a serious offense here in Gingerbread Land and unfortunately for you, you have chosen to upset the wrong officer of the law!"

"An officer of the law?" you ask innocently. Maybe if he thinks you're a complete imbecile, he'll take it easier on you.

"Why, I'm Captain Nutcracker of course!" he shouts at you, emitting a musky odor from his furiously gnashing teeth. He reaches one rounded, gloved hand towards your throat.

Your mind works madly, trying desperately to see a way out of this increasingly hopeless situation. How does one get rid of a fellow like Captain Nutcracker? Wait a minuteÂ…you seem to be remembering something. Isn't there a Nutcracker story where the little girl throws her shoe at the bad guy and saves the day? Something like that might just work in this sick world of fantasy gone horribly wrong! On the other hand, he does seem like an intelligent fellow. Maybe you should just rely on good old-fashioned groveling to see yourself out of this mess.

Make a decision quickly! He's about to throttle you!