POTC - A Piratical Romp Through the Movie
You decide to confuse them with logic. "I may have already been in the water, gents, but diving into the water and swimming is by very nature faster than being in the water and swimming from a dead stop."
The men look at each other, each trying to make sense of what you told them. Finally, Mullroy tells you, "Right, em, you're free to go then. Much thanks for your time."
You clap both hands together and give a slight bow. And as you leave, you salute them as well.
But as you salute, the sleeve that is concealing your pirate tattoo slips down. Mullroy notices and once again raises his rifle at you. "Hold there, Man! By what name do you go by?"
"Smith. Or Smithy, if you like."
Mullroy continues with another question, "What's your purpose in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?" and Murtogg interjects, "Yeah. and no lies."
"Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out!" you tell them.
"I said no lies!" Murtogg yells.
"I think he's telling the truth." counters Mullroy.
" If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us."
This too easy, you think to yourself. "Unless, of course, he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you."
Mullroy looks at you with sudden realization. "What is your actual name . . . your pirate name?"
A burst of pride erupts in you, and unable to hide your name any longer, you answer, "I am Captain Jack Sparrow of the Black Pearl. She is the fastest ship in the Spanish Main, and I will have her back."
This begins an argument between the two officers.
"WellÂ…there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor for speed."
"The Black Pearl is a real ship."
"No, no it's not."
"Yes, it is, I've seen it."
"You've seen it?"
"Yes."
"You haven't seen it."
"Yes, I have."
"You've seen a ship with black sails, that's crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out?"
"No."
"No."
"But I have seen a ship with black sails"
"Oh, and no ship that's not crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out could possibly have black sails therefore couldn't possibly be any other ship than the Black Pearl. Is that what you're saying"?
"No."
"Like I said, there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor . . ."
By this time, you have already escaped onto the Interceptor's deck. Mullroy notices. "You don't have permission to be aboard there, mate. Halt!"
Murtogg runs up behind, and claps you in irons. You are now on your way to jail.
The men look at each other, each trying to make sense of what you told them. Finally, Mullroy tells you, "Right, em, you're free to go then. Much thanks for your time."
You clap both hands together and give a slight bow. And as you leave, you salute them as well.
But as you salute, the sleeve that is concealing your pirate tattoo slips down. Mullroy notices and once again raises his rifle at you. "Hold there, Man! By what name do you go by?"
"Smith. Or Smithy, if you like."
Mullroy continues with another question, "What's your purpose in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?" and Murtogg interjects, "Yeah. and no lies."
"Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out!" you tell them.
"I said no lies!" Murtogg yells.
"I think he's telling the truth." counters Mullroy.
" If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us."
This too easy, you think to yourself. "Unless, of course, he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you."
Mullroy looks at you with sudden realization. "What is your actual name . . . your pirate name?"
A burst of pride erupts in you, and unable to hide your name any longer, you answer, "I am Captain Jack Sparrow of the Black Pearl. She is the fastest ship in the Spanish Main, and I will have her back."
This begins an argument between the two officers.
"WellÂ…there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor for speed."
"The Black Pearl is a real ship."
"No, no it's not."
"Yes, it is, I've seen it."
"You've seen it?"
"Yes."
"You haven't seen it."
"Yes, I have."
"You've seen a ship with black sails, that's crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out?"
"No."
"No."
"But I have seen a ship with black sails"
"Oh, and no ship that's not crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out could possibly have black sails therefore couldn't possibly be any other ship than the Black Pearl. Is that what you're saying"?
"No."
"Like I said, there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor . . ."
By this time, you have already escaped onto the Interceptor's deck. Mullroy notices. "You don't have permission to be aboard there, mate. Halt!"
Murtogg runs up behind, and claps you in irons. You are now on your way to jail.