The Drakes of Heaven and Earth.

Chico C Hammitt: What? You afraid of more morons in black leotards?!

Clay(ton) Grimm:[Sarcastically] Why would I be afraid when we have "The All-powerful Chico!" Protecting us?!

CH: Save the sarcasm for Loke...

[They head into the MATV together.]

Narrator: Arriving at Koigokkoro.

CH:[In awe] Wow! It's beautiful!

Erza Scarlet: It sure is...So full of colors and life...

Tour guide: Hey you three! You wanna tour of Koigokkoro?! It's free! And you each get a flower crown as a gift at the end of the tour!

CG: It'd be pointless for me...I know all about the history of this region...Though now that I'm looking around, some of these buildings look new...

CH: I say we take it!

ES: I second...

CG: What the hell...[Lying] What could possibly go wrong?

TG: Splendid! Now...The entire Lancaster region was made from the epic battle of forbidden love...Two Earth wizards from rivaling clans...Gednu from the Katōseiji clan to the west, and Gaedei from the Panteon clan to the east!
The two were in love with each other, but their clans were appalled by their betrayal...So the two wizards were give an ultimatum...Fight to the death...Either one would live or neither of them would...So the star-crossed lovers came up with a third option...Wipe out their clans and start anew...The wake of that battle left an impact on not only the region, but most of fiore! The mountains and canyons were scars left on the land after their battle...Gednuyama to the west is were to this day, rock continues to rise from the fault line, even valuable materials! And to the east, Gaedheiya! Fertile lands full of lush forests and foliage with ancient roots spread throughout it! And this city we're in right now, was the crater they consummate their love! Amazing right!?

Ladies:[Amazed] WOW! So tragic and beautiful...

CG: *Snickering*

CH:[Annoyed] What's so funny?

CG:[Lying] It's nothing...Just a bit sappy in my opinion...

CH:[Snapping back] Well no one asked for your opinion...

Little girl:[Tugging on Clayton's coat] Excuse me, mister?

Fairy Wizards:[Looking down] Huh?!

LG:[Showing a picture of a small Koigokkoro Monitor] Have you seen Mr.Kai!? He's been missing for a month and I'm trying my best to look for him...

ES: Sorry...We just got here...But we'll be sure to keep an eye out for him...

CH:[Crouching to her height] But we're gonna have to know where to return him to when we find him...What's your name?

LG: Lisa Canary!

CG:[Surprised] Lisa?! Is that you!?

Lisa Canary: I'm sorry...I don't think I know you...

CG: Of course you wouldn't...I met you when you were just a newborn baby...Matter of fact, me and my sisters helped d-[Stopping himself] Helped pull you out of your mom's belly!

LC: I was in my mom's belly? Why was I there?!

CG: Not her stomach...[Lying] you came out of a beautiful flower blooming from your mom's tummy!...It's where all babies come from...Right girls?

Ladies:...

CG:[Winking] I SAID "Right girls?"

ES&CH:[Getting the hint] Oh! Yeah! That's were babies come from!...

CH:[Under her breath] Though it's a lot further south...

[Erza elbows Chico]

CG: Hey! Do you know where your daddy is? He's expecting us...

LC: Hmmm...He should be around here somewhere...

CG:[Shielding Lisa and pushing Erza and Chico out of the way.Shouting] HIT THE DECK!!!

*BOOM!!!*

[Clayton caught a sniper round with his teeth. Swallowing it. A deafening shockwave crashed upon the scene]

CG: Tungsten carbide...Your not messing around...Now...Show yourself assassin!

Assassin:[Landing nearby] Damn...I hoped that your senses were exaggerate...My mistake...

CG:[Recognizes him] Well I'll be...Who's ass did I screw with to be targeted by Death's Head Caucus's former Ace Assassin?!...No wait, let me guess...The Balam Alliance...

Assassin: Give the man a prize...Don't take this personally...They've hired me to kill The Drakes of Heaven and Earth...I would've declined if I had a choice...

ES:[Sword at the ready] Clay! Who the hell is this man!?!

CG: Ladies! Meet Roland Raionzu...Or...Death's Sickle...Have to say...Love the name by the way!...Much better than Eisenwald's Ace...Death God...Sounds so full of himself...But yours...Much more modest...Last I heard you took up religion...Guess it didn't stick...

Roland Raionzu: *Humphf* No...I guess it didn't...Do you know why I didn't decline them?

CG: No...Enlighten me!

RR: The one time I defied their command, they killed my wife right in front of me...And sold my eldest daughter into child slavery...It was then that I knew I had to be their lap dog...For my last child's sake...And now I'm here to kill you, And then Tempestas...

CG: You don't have to! We've taken them down in size! Instead of five core guilds it's now three! And that was only what we've done in four years! Imagine what we can do with a decade! The alliance is scared of us...And rightfully so...

RR: Yes...I heard Tempestas took out the Stygian Heretics...And you took out the Hollow Litches...That was the guild that took my wife's life and my daughter's freedom from me...I hoped you made them suffer...

CG: They did...They're rotting in hell right now...

RR:...