Another Monday Morning

You begin to eat the Jelly ben stats when you have a momentary flash of inspiration - you don't know what the hell a jelly ben stat is! In fact you are actually eating soap.

Sadly, this inspriation fades quickly and you continue to eat Jelly ben stats happily.

Later the next day your mother drops by to find you dead on the floor, with dish soap ozzing out of your mouth. Her biggest regret is not teaching how to better use household cleaners before you moved out on your own.
End Of Story