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The Great Sael Adventure 1

You, the crew, and the Commodore all hurriedly make double quick to get back to The Bonnie, aiming to avoid your cruel and unusually puce fate.

As you weigh anchor and set sail, the island begins to shake. The Commodore shouts, "To the fore!" The crew are generally confused about the relevance of this particular directive, but they generally have a good idea of what he means and know his heart is in the right place. They begin to work even faster.

As the sails fill and The Bonnie heads out to sea, a gaggle of gnarly, enchanted fruits leave their posts among the island's trees and scream—mouths open, teeth glistening and scintillating, saliva shining—toward the sailors. The fruits fly away and quickly catch up to The Bonnie. They pose in front of the boat and holler out "NOOOO!!!!" in a multitude of at least 39 languages, all of which honestly sounded a little whiny. Then, out of the sugary saliva crawl the fruit fairies, covered in a saccharine slime, dismembering and distending the husked corpses into the briny deep. The fairies yell out "NOOOOO!!!!!!" in a multitude of at least 42 languages. The crew are petrified.

The buffed, buff skipper asked, "No... what?" He asked this tenderly, shaking in his boots, which were also petrified and also buffed.

The fairies—in general confusion and tempered disgust—shouted "Just NOOOO!!!" In unison, they continue wailing "You can't just leave! Nobody can escape their cruel and unusual fate, set upon them by a cruel and unusual fairy is cruel and nefarious and fairylike! Noooooo!!!!"

Although impressed by their display of synchronous speech, the Commodore is neither afraid nor aghast. He glares, unwafering, lightning splitting the air of the island behind him, his tresses ferociously blowing in the salty ocean gusts, his lips wet, despite the air—cold and biting, like his attitude toward the Ocelot.