The Ballad of Crud and Horgus v1.1

You challenge your horse, Horgus to a duel. A cowboy hat appears on his head. You both walk ten paces in opposite directions. The two of you turn around to face each other. You suddenly feel an overwhelming sense of dread as you look into Horgus' eyes. You know this is the end. How could you have been so stupid?
Before you even have time to react, Horgus unloads the entire chamber into your chest. You fall, crumbling to the hot earth. You look up at Horgus, who is now smoking a cigar. It's badass.