CRACK ATTACK!

"Nobody move or the bitch gets it!" you proclaim threateningly, grabbing your mother from behind and pressing the shank to her throat.

Your mother rolls her eyes and motions for the guards to continue their advance. "There are sharper plastic knives over next to the slushy machine than this little shithead's toy shank," she adds. "Dammit, mom!" you protest. "You're really starting to piss me off."

"Well I rue the day I ever conceived you," your mother spits in disdain. "WELL THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SUCH A LITTLE SLUT!" you fire back. By that time the guards have surrounded you. Before you can register what's happeneing, your mother worms her way free from your clutches and all three of the guards gang-tackle you to the cold, hard ground.

"Do whatever you want to him," your mother tells them, wiping her hands. "Just get him out of my sight." What a bitch.

The guards haul you off to the interrogation chambers...