CRACK ATTACK!
"Alright, Rob," you indulge your cousin. "Hitler, the Third Reich, and every trucker and housewife in the 1950s used it. Tell me more."
He smiles. "Thank you. First of all, let's talk economics. Meth costs less, has a much wider consumer base, and the high lasts five times as long as crack. We're not in the crack-boom of the eighties, my friend. This is the 21st Century." "Tell me more," you goad him on, scratching your shriveled balls in mock-thoughtfulness.
Your cousin nods appreciatively and pulls down a chart. "According to our latest estimates," he goes on, "by the year 2030 nearly 6 out of every 10 druggies will be hooked on this shit. Not only is this a wise investment, it's fashionable as well."
Well who doesn't like to be fashionable!? "But is the buzz as good?" you ask suspiciously. "Quantity over quality isn't exactly better." Robs nods in agreement. "SO true. But actually, the really good meth is so good it numbs your throat like the good Peruvian coke does. It focues your mind and makes even the most menial tasks seem interesting. And when you take into account the fact that a crack buzz lasts but thirty minutes, and a meth buzz lasts 3 days, it all comes together. I know the withdrawals are a bitch. But believe me, you'll be very happy with the transition when it's all done."
You're ALMOST sold. ALMOST. "But first I want to try some," you insist. Rob agrees to this, and the two of you smoke several grams.
He's right - it's a really good buzz. But it's still...different. Crack is crack. There's nothing like it. Meth may come close, but it's still so...different. Damn. Tough choice. Well, what will it be, crackhead?
He smiles. "Thank you. First of all, let's talk economics. Meth costs less, has a much wider consumer base, and the high lasts five times as long as crack. We're not in the crack-boom of the eighties, my friend. This is the 21st Century." "Tell me more," you goad him on, scratching your shriveled balls in mock-thoughtfulness.
Your cousin nods appreciatively and pulls down a chart. "According to our latest estimates," he goes on, "by the year 2030 nearly 6 out of every 10 druggies will be hooked on this shit. Not only is this a wise investment, it's fashionable as well."
Well who doesn't like to be fashionable!? "But is the buzz as good?" you ask suspiciously. "Quantity over quality isn't exactly better." Robs nods in agreement. "SO true. But actually, the really good meth is so good it numbs your throat like the good Peruvian coke does. It focues your mind and makes even the most menial tasks seem interesting. And when you take into account the fact that a crack buzz lasts but thirty minutes, and a meth buzz lasts 3 days, it all comes together. I know the withdrawals are a bitch. But believe me, you'll be very happy with the transition when it's all done."
You're ALMOST sold. ALMOST. "But first I want to try some," you insist. Rob agrees to this, and the two of you smoke several grams.
He's right - it's a really good buzz. But it's still...different. Crack is crack. There's nothing like it. Meth may come close, but it's still so...different. Damn. Tough choice. Well, what will it be, crackhead?