The Galactic Adventures of Pierce Darkblade
Despite the insistence of your crew, you decide that it's time to risk their lives for your own personal glory.
You begin to address the bridge crew in what you believe will be an awe inspiring speech, "Men," you pause for effect.
Unfortunately, you are already interrupted by the young female Lt. McGee who mutters, "there's more than just men here," as she rolls her eyes.
"Ahem!" you say loudly. You begin anew, "Men and," shouting, "WOMEN!" You look directly at Lt. McGee who nods approvingly. You continue, "It has come to my attention that you all want to visit some resort planet where you can sit around getting free massages for the rest of your days. But as your captain, nay, your spiritual leader, I can soundly say it is not what you need."
Lt. Mason stands up in protest, "what we need is to get out of here." You glare at him in silence until he sits down submissively.
You return to your speech, "What you all need is a nice uplifting experience where you can all come together as a team. A challenge, if you will. And I have just the experience in mind." You strike a triumphant pose and say commandingly, "Lt. Mason, set course for Septon space."
"Captain!" Commander Fraglon asserts himself, "you can't be serious?! The war between the Septons and the Gorgons has raged for over three millennia!"
You nod affirmingly, "Yes, indeed Commander, and we're going to insert ourselves right in the middle of it."
Commander Fraglon is shocked, "But they use banned weapons like atomizers, chemical warfare, and BIOWEAPONS! I heard they take prisoners just so they can fire them out of railguns at each other!"
"Indeed they do, Commander," you say dismissively, "I suggest you don't get captured."
The Commander places his head in his hands unable to rationalize what you're proposing.
Now, unless there's any questions," the hands of every bridge officer's hands shoot up and you promptly ignore them, "Here's the plan."
You begin to address the bridge crew in what you believe will be an awe inspiring speech, "Men," you pause for effect.
Unfortunately, you are already interrupted by the young female Lt. McGee who mutters, "there's more than just men here," as she rolls her eyes.
"Ahem!" you say loudly. You begin anew, "Men and," shouting, "WOMEN!" You look directly at Lt. McGee who nods approvingly. You continue, "It has come to my attention that you all want to visit some resort planet where you can sit around getting free massages for the rest of your days. But as your captain, nay, your spiritual leader, I can soundly say it is not what you need."
Lt. Mason stands up in protest, "what we need is to get out of here." You glare at him in silence until he sits down submissively.
You return to your speech, "What you all need is a nice uplifting experience where you can all come together as a team. A challenge, if you will. And I have just the experience in mind." You strike a triumphant pose and say commandingly, "Lt. Mason, set course for Septon space."
"Captain!" Commander Fraglon asserts himself, "you can't be serious?! The war between the Septons and the Gorgons has raged for over three millennia!"
You nod affirmingly, "Yes, indeed Commander, and we're going to insert ourselves right in the middle of it."
Commander Fraglon is shocked, "But they use banned weapons like atomizers, chemical warfare, and BIOWEAPONS! I heard they take prisoners just so they can fire them out of railguns at each other!"
"Indeed they do, Commander," you say dismissively, "I suggest you don't get captured."
The Commander places his head in his hands unable to rationalize what you're proposing.
Now, unless there's any questions," the hands of every bridge officer's hands shoot up and you promptly ignore them, "Here's the plan."