Suzy’s Strange Saga
As charmingly strange as Johnny’s awkwardness is you’re still not quite ready to go jumping into a relationship with another guy.
“That’s sweet Johnny. Really it is. It’s just… I’m not looking for another relationship right now. I just broke up with my boyfriend and I think I need to be by myself for a while.” You say.
“Boyfriend? I see. I suppose a pretty girl like you would have a lot of them.” Johnny says. You notice his tone sort of becomes “flat” when he says this.
“Pfft hardly. He was my first and only one.” You say.
And as quickly as his demeanor changed before, it changes AGAIN just as quickly. Before you got the impression he was almost pissed upon hearing you even HAD a boyfriend despite the fact he was your ex. After your additional information, it’s almost like he’s perked up again.
“Ah, okay…I understand. First love and lost. Been there before. Say no more, I’ll leave you be. It was a long shot anyway.”
Just as Johnny is about to leave, you sort of feel like you should say something helpful.
“Johnny?”
“Yes, Suzy?”
“You’re a good guy Johnny, and I’m sure there’s some girl out there for you.”
“I know, but she probably killed herself when she found out I was the guy for her.” Johnny says with a small chuckle.
“Anyway, thank you for being upfront and trying to be encouraging. I must say though, whoever your ex was, he must’ve been an idiot to let you get away.”
You watch as Johnny disappears into the crowd and you shut your door.
Having dealt with your momentary break up of your usual routine, you briefly check your phone for the time and to see if maybe your sister tried to call (You still think she probably got hauled in by the cops) but nobody has called.
Having little else to do, you go back to what you were doing before.
Hours pass and you start to get hungry which unfortunately means you’re going to have to brave going out there and raiding the kitchen assuming there’s even anything in there.
You exit your room and find that the party is still as lively as ever. Nobody pays too much attention to you as you creep through the crowd.
The kitchen is a complete wreck. You don’t exactly know what went on in here, but there is some guy lying face down on a broken kitchen table. His head is bleeding and there are several broken beer bottles all over the floor. You almost hesitate to step inside the room, though there are a couple of other people just standing around in the kitchen drinking as if nothing was wrong.
“Jesus Christ.” You say. “Does that guy need an ambulance?” you ask.
Eventually one of the people in the kitchen realizes you were asking them.
“Hrm? Oh him? Yeah he’s fine. Just got drunk, got into a fight and then well as you can see he wasn’t the winner. He does this all the time.” A girl says in a bored tone.
“Yeah well I’d appreciate it, if he and whoever else was involved hadn’t wrecked the goddamn kitchen in the process!”
“What’s the big deal and what concern is it of yours? It’s Julie’s kitchen and she won’t care.”
“I happen to live here so it actually is somewhat of my concern, and where is Julie anyway?”
“I dunno. Probably getting fucked as usual. Still don’t know why you’re worried about it. Besides some weird guy said he was getting something to clean up the mess anyway.” The girl says and goes back to talking with the guy she was previously talking to.
“Weird guy?” you say to yourself.
“Hey, Suzy.”
You turn around and see Johnny behind you with a broom, a dustpan and some sort of cleaning product.
“Johnny, what are you still doing…wait, have you been lingering all night around hoping that I might come out of my room?”
Johnny looks away a bit as if you hit the nail on the head.
“Well…actually at first I was kind of hoping that maybe you’d change your mind and come running out of your room to find me. A silly storybook fantasy really…but then after about an hour of indulging in that delusion I realized I needed to accept reality. I was going to leave, but then I suddenly got offered a video game controller from a guy that stopped playing, so I started playing. I ended up getting sort of wrapped up in the game, shooting people in the face, murdering hookers and such. Sort of fun, and made me feel better.”
Johnny passes you by and starts sweeping up broken glass and continues talking.
“After my escapism with virtual violence then I decided to go home, but then I heard about a fight going on in the kitchen so I decided to be a spectator, but by the time I got here, it was already over and the winner went out the back door. I didn’t think it was right to just leave your kitchen like this even if nobody else cared, so I tried to find your friend Julie because I didn’t want to bother you again since you made your feelings quite clear to me and I didn’t want to look like a stalker.”
“A little late for that, Johnny.” You say.
“Heh, well anyway I couldn’t find her. I asked around and someone said she left wit ha couple guys. So not knowing what else to do, I just decided to clean up the mess myself before I left.”
“Wait a minute, are you telling me Julie isn’t here for her own fucking party?”
“Uh, no it appears she isn’t.”
It’s one thing to have to put up with the parties when she’s actually here, but if she’s not even going to be here then why the hell do you have to still put up with it? So much for Julie’s sob story about going to turn over a new leaf after your talk. You’re annoyed and to top it off you’re still really hungry.
“Goddamnit all I wanted to do is get some food from the fucking kitchen…” you say.
“Did you want me to order a pizza for you?”
“I don’t have any money.”
“So? I got some money, I’ll be happy to buy you a pizza, I’ll get you a drink too.”
Actually you don’t have anything against Johnny’s offer, but you’re hesitant to accept.
“Johnny, I’ll accept your offer, BUT I don’t want YOU to get it in your head that I owe you something because of it.”
“Thought never crossed my mind.” Johnny says. He doesn’t even seem hurt by your implication.
“Okay. Sorry, I got a little authoritative there.”
“No, no, I get it. It’s smart for you to lay that out there immediately. Anyway I’ll call up the place and I’ll get it to you when it’s here. In the meantime you can go back and relax in your room if you wish.” Johnny says continuing to sweep.
“Oh. Um okay. Thanks. Hey, do you think we should call an ambulance for that guy on the floor?” you ask Johnny.
“Him? Nah, he’s fine. I actually checked him soon after I came in here. Really I would’ve rolled him over on his back, but with all the broken glass on the floor I probably would’ve done more harm. Anyway I got this, don’t worry.” Johnny says.
Well he might be a weird guy who seems creepy at times and is definitely stalking you a bit, but at least he’s helpful which is more that can be said for Julie who has seemingly just abandoned her own party. You try to call her up, but you get no answer, but you weren’t really expecting one anyway.
Still it is weird that she left. Julie’s always been irresponsible, but she’s like you in that she barely ever leaves the house. After all, why would she go get fucked, drunk and high elsewhere when she can do it right here?
In any case, she’ll probably be back, and you go back to wasting your time on the Internet. After a half hour passes and there’s a knock on the door.
“Pizza delivery.” Johnny says.
“Okay.” You answer and get up to open the door.
“Here you go. I ordered a standard pepperoni and cheese pizza and got you Coke. Hope that’s okay, since I forgot to ask what you like.”
“It’s fine. Thank you.”
“Alright then, I’ll leave you be.” Johnny says starting to leave.
You don’t know what it is about this guy but…
“Hey Johnny, did you want some pizza?”
“Huh? Oh, nah. I’m good. I ate a little earlier. I don’t tend to eat much anyway.”
“Hm, don’t eat much, don’t sleep much. You sure you’re human?” you half joke.
This causes an unusual guffaw of laughter that you didn’t expect from him.
“I sometimes wonder that myself.” He says still chuckling. “Enjoy the rest of your evening Suzy.”
Johnny once again disappears into the crowd in the living room and you lock your door.
The rest of your night is pretty much eating your pizza, drinking your coke, taking a quick shower and then eventually settling in for the night. You have no idea if the part is still going on outside, but the noise has decreased a little, so maybe it’s starting to wind down.
Well at least you don’t need to share your bed this time.
“That’s sweet Johnny. Really it is. It’s just… I’m not looking for another relationship right now. I just broke up with my boyfriend and I think I need to be by myself for a while.” You say.
“Boyfriend? I see. I suppose a pretty girl like you would have a lot of them.” Johnny says. You notice his tone sort of becomes “flat” when he says this.
“Pfft hardly. He was my first and only one.” You say.
And as quickly as his demeanor changed before, it changes AGAIN just as quickly. Before you got the impression he was almost pissed upon hearing you even HAD a boyfriend despite the fact he was your ex. After your additional information, it’s almost like he’s perked up again.
“Ah, okay…I understand. First love and lost. Been there before. Say no more, I’ll leave you be. It was a long shot anyway.”
Just as Johnny is about to leave, you sort of feel like you should say something helpful.
“Johnny?”
“Yes, Suzy?”
“You’re a good guy Johnny, and I’m sure there’s some girl out there for you.”
“I know, but she probably killed herself when she found out I was the guy for her.” Johnny says with a small chuckle.
“Anyway, thank you for being upfront and trying to be encouraging. I must say though, whoever your ex was, he must’ve been an idiot to let you get away.”
You watch as Johnny disappears into the crowd and you shut your door.
Having dealt with your momentary break up of your usual routine, you briefly check your phone for the time and to see if maybe your sister tried to call (You still think she probably got hauled in by the cops) but nobody has called.
Having little else to do, you go back to what you were doing before.
Hours pass and you start to get hungry which unfortunately means you’re going to have to brave going out there and raiding the kitchen assuming there’s even anything in there.
You exit your room and find that the party is still as lively as ever. Nobody pays too much attention to you as you creep through the crowd.
The kitchen is a complete wreck. You don’t exactly know what went on in here, but there is some guy lying face down on a broken kitchen table. His head is bleeding and there are several broken beer bottles all over the floor. You almost hesitate to step inside the room, though there are a couple of other people just standing around in the kitchen drinking as if nothing was wrong.
“Jesus Christ.” You say. “Does that guy need an ambulance?” you ask.
Eventually one of the people in the kitchen realizes you were asking them.
“Hrm? Oh him? Yeah he’s fine. Just got drunk, got into a fight and then well as you can see he wasn’t the winner. He does this all the time.” A girl says in a bored tone.
“Yeah well I’d appreciate it, if he and whoever else was involved hadn’t wrecked the goddamn kitchen in the process!”
“What’s the big deal and what concern is it of yours? It’s Julie’s kitchen and she won’t care.”
“I happen to live here so it actually is somewhat of my concern, and where is Julie anyway?”
“I dunno. Probably getting fucked as usual. Still don’t know why you’re worried about it. Besides some weird guy said he was getting something to clean up the mess anyway.” The girl says and goes back to talking with the guy she was previously talking to.
“Weird guy?” you say to yourself.
“Hey, Suzy.”
You turn around and see Johnny behind you with a broom, a dustpan and some sort of cleaning product.
“Johnny, what are you still doing…wait, have you been lingering all night around hoping that I might come out of my room?”
Johnny looks away a bit as if you hit the nail on the head.
“Well…actually at first I was kind of hoping that maybe you’d change your mind and come running out of your room to find me. A silly storybook fantasy really…but then after about an hour of indulging in that delusion I realized I needed to accept reality. I was going to leave, but then I suddenly got offered a video game controller from a guy that stopped playing, so I started playing. I ended up getting sort of wrapped up in the game, shooting people in the face, murdering hookers and such. Sort of fun, and made me feel better.”
Johnny passes you by and starts sweeping up broken glass and continues talking.
“After my escapism with virtual violence then I decided to go home, but then I heard about a fight going on in the kitchen so I decided to be a spectator, but by the time I got here, it was already over and the winner went out the back door. I didn’t think it was right to just leave your kitchen like this even if nobody else cared, so I tried to find your friend Julie because I didn’t want to bother you again since you made your feelings quite clear to me and I didn’t want to look like a stalker.”
“A little late for that, Johnny.” You say.
“Heh, well anyway I couldn’t find her. I asked around and someone said she left wit ha couple guys. So not knowing what else to do, I just decided to clean up the mess myself before I left.”
“Wait a minute, are you telling me Julie isn’t here for her own fucking party?”
“Uh, no it appears she isn’t.”
It’s one thing to have to put up with the parties when she’s actually here, but if she’s not even going to be here then why the hell do you have to still put up with it? So much for Julie’s sob story about going to turn over a new leaf after your talk. You’re annoyed and to top it off you’re still really hungry.
“Goddamnit all I wanted to do is get some food from the fucking kitchen…” you say.
“Did you want me to order a pizza for you?”
“I don’t have any money.”
“So? I got some money, I’ll be happy to buy you a pizza, I’ll get you a drink too.”
Actually you don’t have anything against Johnny’s offer, but you’re hesitant to accept.
“Johnny, I’ll accept your offer, BUT I don’t want YOU to get it in your head that I owe you something because of it.”
“Thought never crossed my mind.” Johnny says. He doesn’t even seem hurt by your implication.
“Okay. Sorry, I got a little authoritative there.”
“No, no, I get it. It’s smart for you to lay that out there immediately. Anyway I’ll call up the place and I’ll get it to you when it’s here. In the meantime you can go back and relax in your room if you wish.” Johnny says continuing to sweep.
“Oh. Um okay. Thanks. Hey, do you think we should call an ambulance for that guy on the floor?” you ask Johnny.
“Him? Nah, he’s fine. I actually checked him soon after I came in here. Really I would’ve rolled him over on his back, but with all the broken glass on the floor I probably would’ve done more harm. Anyway I got this, don’t worry.” Johnny says.
Well he might be a weird guy who seems creepy at times and is definitely stalking you a bit, but at least he’s helpful which is more that can be said for Julie who has seemingly just abandoned her own party. You try to call her up, but you get no answer, but you weren’t really expecting one anyway.
Still it is weird that she left. Julie’s always been irresponsible, but she’s like you in that she barely ever leaves the house. After all, why would she go get fucked, drunk and high elsewhere when she can do it right here?
In any case, she’ll probably be back, and you go back to wasting your time on the Internet. After a half hour passes and there’s a knock on the door.
“Pizza delivery.” Johnny says.
“Okay.” You answer and get up to open the door.
“Here you go. I ordered a standard pepperoni and cheese pizza and got you Coke. Hope that’s okay, since I forgot to ask what you like.”
“It’s fine. Thank you.”
“Alright then, I’ll leave you be.” Johnny says starting to leave.
You don’t know what it is about this guy but…
“Hey Johnny, did you want some pizza?”
“Huh? Oh, nah. I’m good. I ate a little earlier. I don’t tend to eat much anyway.”
“Hm, don’t eat much, don’t sleep much. You sure you’re human?” you half joke.
This causes an unusual guffaw of laughter that you didn’t expect from him.
“I sometimes wonder that myself.” He says still chuckling. “Enjoy the rest of your evening Suzy.”
Johnny once again disappears into the crowd in the living room and you lock your door.
The rest of your night is pretty much eating your pizza, drinking your coke, taking a quick shower and then eventually settling in for the night. You have no idea if the part is still going on outside, but the noise has decreased a little, so maybe it’s starting to wind down.
Well at least you don’t need to share your bed this time.