Ducky Park
"I like pizza," You say.
"Good," He says. "The pizza stand is over by the kiddie park. Let them know you're the new guy and they'll train you."
"Okay," You say. Your uncle walks away and leaves you standing there. You stand just like that for a few moments before you decide that it would probably be best if you go to the pizza stand and start working.
It isn't a long walk to the pizza stand, but you have to wade through a sea of screaming children to reach it. Once through the masses you reach the stand and enter through the employee gate.
There is only one customer there, waiting on her order. The young lady at the register is a good two years younger than you. She is the vision of perfection, an angel in a duck hat. Her pouty lips are alluring and her blonde hair frames her gorgeous face like a circle of radiance. She smiles at you.
"Are you the new guy?" She asks.
"Yeah," You say. You hope you don't sound stupid. "My name is Ricky-"
"Holy shit, is that Ricky Retardo?!" You hear from behind her as you see the young man who was working on the pizza pie direct his attention towards you. One of your greatest fears is suddenly realized when your eyes meet his. He is smiling broadly. "For fuck's sake it is. Hot damn. I thought they had you retards working mostly manufacturing gigs."
His name is Donny, and he was the absolute worst thing that could happen to you in high school. You can only imagine having to work with him will be equally devastating. He locked you in a janitors closet once and when the janitor opened the door for you Donny was there with a crowd of people to make jokes about you coming out of the closet. To make matters worse, when everyone was done laughing the janitor told you (probably louder than he had intended) "The door doesn't lock from the inside." Everyone laughed even harder. Plus one time Donny gave you a swirly in a toilet he had just shat in.
"Hi, Donny," You say to him, trying to be courteous.
"Man, I can't believe you work here," He says, handing the pizza to the young lady. She serves it in turn to the customer. "This is going to be so awesome."
All thoughts you had vaguely entertained about enjoying your time working at the pizza stand suddenly shatter like a hammer to tempered glass. Your world comes crashing down.
"I'm Sally," The young lady tells you.
"Great," You reply glumly.
Donny sits on the counter facing you. "Man, I was such a dick to you in high school."
"Yeah you were," You say.
"I'm sorry, dude. I can't believe I was such an asshole. I was just trying to look cool in front of everyone and stuff, but I shouldn't have behaved like that."
"Okay," You say.
"What did you do?" the girl asks.
"I was terrible," Donny admits. "I locked him in lockers, gave him swirlies, beat the shit out of him almost daily, and we all called him Ricky Retardo. Anyway, I'm sorry Ricky."
"Yeah, okay," You tell him. You can't help but feel that there is more to this, that his apology is little more than a setup for further cruelty. But nothing happens. You serve two more customers when he starts trying to reminisce with you.
"Remember that time you started chewing gum from under the desk?" He asks.
"Oh yeah," you say, "The red gum and the green gum weren't too bad but the blue and pink were pretty much guaranteed nasty."
"Dude, that's all guaranteed nasty." Donny says with a chuckle.
"No it's not," You argue; "It's resourceful."
"No it's not," Sally says, "That's gross, Ricky."
"Whatever," You say.
The three of you sit in silence for a few seconds when Donny starts talking of the old days again. "You remember the time I took your head and dunked it in the toilet right after I took a big nasty shit in it? Oh man, that was hilarious." He and Sally begin laughing.
As they laugh at you, you realize that any hope you had of impressing Sally has been completely destroyed. You can't take anymore, you lose control. They just keep laughing. Everything goes red and hazy, you grip the pizza cutter in your hand and grind your teeth. Sally is still laughing and Donny is saying something that you can't make out over the blood pounding in your ears.
You swipe at his neck with the circular blade, opening a gash in his throat. Blood splashes in a trail along the wall. The bully from your high school days clutches futilely at his throat as the blood pours over his fingers and stains his shirt beneath. Sally is screaming and backing slowly towards the door. Customers are gawking at you and children are crying.
Security is on you before you know what is happening. You are tried and convicted, your sentence lowered due to the instability of your mind. You sit in prison and stare blankly at the walls often. You think back on the glory of the moment when you were finally able to repay that fucking dickhead, Donny. He had that coming for a long time.
Sometimes, late at night when you bite into your pillow as your cell mate fucks you up the ass, you wonder if it was all worth it. But when you think back on the look of terror on Donny's face when he was dying on the floor, a sense of peace comes over you and you realize that it was. You never would have had the opportunity had it not been for Ducky Park.
"Good," He says. "The pizza stand is over by the kiddie park. Let them know you're the new guy and they'll train you."
"Okay," You say. Your uncle walks away and leaves you standing there. You stand just like that for a few moments before you decide that it would probably be best if you go to the pizza stand and start working.
It isn't a long walk to the pizza stand, but you have to wade through a sea of screaming children to reach it. Once through the masses you reach the stand and enter through the employee gate.
There is only one customer there, waiting on her order. The young lady at the register is a good two years younger than you. She is the vision of perfection, an angel in a duck hat. Her pouty lips are alluring and her blonde hair frames her gorgeous face like a circle of radiance. She smiles at you.
"Are you the new guy?" She asks.
"Yeah," You say. You hope you don't sound stupid. "My name is Ricky-"
"Holy shit, is that Ricky Retardo?!" You hear from behind her as you see the young man who was working on the pizza pie direct his attention towards you. One of your greatest fears is suddenly realized when your eyes meet his. He is smiling broadly. "For fuck's sake it is. Hot damn. I thought they had you retards working mostly manufacturing gigs."
His name is Donny, and he was the absolute worst thing that could happen to you in high school. You can only imagine having to work with him will be equally devastating. He locked you in a janitors closet once and when the janitor opened the door for you Donny was there with a crowd of people to make jokes about you coming out of the closet. To make matters worse, when everyone was done laughing the janitor told you (probably louder than he had intended) "The door doesn't lock from the inside." Everyone laughed even harder. Plus one time Donny gave you a swirly in a toilet he had just shat in.
"Hi, Donny," You say to him, trying to be courteous.
"Man, I can't believe you work here," He says, handing the pizza to the young lady. She serves it in turn to the customer. "This is going to be so awesome."
All thoughts you had vaguely entertained about enjoying your time working at the pizza stand suddenly shatter like a hammer to tempered glass. Your world comes crashing down.
"I'm Sally," The young lady tells you.
"Great," You reply glumly.
Donny sits on the counter facing you. "Man, I was such a dick to you in high school."
"Yeah you were," You say.
"I'm sorry, dude. I can't believe I was such an asshole. I was just trying to look cool in front of everyone and stuff, but I shouldn't have behaved like that."
"Okay," You say.
"What did you do?" the girl asks.
"I was terrible," Donny admits. "I locked him in lockers, gave him swirlies, beat the shit out of him almost daily, and we all called him Ricky Retardo. Anyway, I'm sorry Ricky."
"Yeah, okay," You tell him. You can't help but feel that there is more to this, that his apology is little more than a setup for further cruelty. But nothing happens. You serve two more customers when he starts trying to reminisce with you.
"Remember that time you started chewing gum from under the desk?" He asks.
"Oh yeah," you say, "The red gum and the green gum weren't too bad but the blue and pink were pretty much guaranteed nasty."
"Dude, that's all guaranteed nasty." Donny says with a chuckle.
"No it's not," You argue; "It's resourceful."
"No it's not," Sally says, "That's gross, Ricky."
"Whatever," You say.
The three of you sit in silence for a few seconds when Donny starts talking of the old days again. "You remember the time I took your head and dunked it in the toilet right after I took a big nasty shit in it? Oh man, that was hilarious." He and Sally begin laughing.
As they laugh at you, you realize that any hope you had of impressing Sally has been completely destroyed. You can't take anymore, you lose control. They just keep laughing. Everything goes red and hazy, you grip the pizza cutter in your hand and grind your teeth. Sally is still laughing and Donny is saying something that you can't make out over the blood pounding in your ears.
You swipe at his neck with the circular blade, opening a gash in his throat. Blood splashes in a trail along the wall. The bully from your high school days clutches futilely at his throat as the blood pours over his fingers and stains his shirt beneath. Sally is screaming and backing slowly towards the door. Customers are gawking at you and children are crying.
Security is on you before you know what is happening. You are tried and convicted, your sentence lowered due to the instability of your mind. You sit in prison and stare blankly at the walls often. You think back on the glory of the moment when you were finally able to repay that fucking dickhead, Donny. He had that coming for a long time.
Sometimes, late at night when you bite into your pillow as your cell mate fucks you up the ass, you wonder if it was all worth it. But when you think back on the look of terror on Donny's face when he was dying on the floor, a sense of peace comes over you and you realize that it was. You never would have had the opportunity had it not been for Ducky Park.
