Try the new AI-powered Infinite Story.

Diamonds Are Expensive

The first thing you do is have the most satisfying piss of your life. Relief beyond belief... Then you find a computer.
Logging onto a terminal you key in the appropriate access codes and reort to 'The Camel' another operative, location unknown, who will act as a cyber courier between you and HQ.
You use the contact code. The conversation looks like this:

*Little Fish reeling in Big Fish.*
*Acknowledged. How's the water?*
*The water's fine! Come on in!*
*I've overfished this pond. Cthulu is near.*
*Do you have any more bait?*
*Negative, Little Fish. The fat hippo swims with the dolphins.*
*The maggots are vile.*
*Arcturis with a wart on his nose*
*What?*
*THe Platypus Cavorts in his best pants*
*Kangeroo accessing Vector Sigma?*
*Mr. Mrs says Adios.*

[contact ends]

Hmmmm.
Sadly, you have no idea what that meant.
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