Cody Christano: The Life of an American Scum Bucket
You climb out of the grave to see a weird looking old man coming toward you. He walks with a slight gimp and is dragging a shovel. The gravekeeper maybe? He sees you, but continues to walk toward you until he comes fully into view. He is a stocky hunchbacked man of about 60. He looks to be blind in one eye and has a few scraggly scraps of gray hair remaining on his dented head. He smiles , revealing a severe lack of bicuspids save maybe four. He looks into the dug up grave than back at you, all smiles. You feel very uneasy.
"I'm Edgar."
"Hi Edgar..."
"These are my friends. Why were you playing with my friends?"
"Well...Edgar.. I...I thought we could share."
He shakes his head violently.
"NO! They are MY friends! YOU CAN'T TAKE THEM FROM ME!" Edgar swings the shovel with incredible velocity, smacking you directly in the side of the head. Everything goes blurry and dark. You stumble and raise your arms to defend yourself. To your dismay, Edgar hits you again and again with the shovel, never missing his mark. The third strike knocks you out.
You awake to the sound of dirt being piled on a coffin. You are in complete darknness. You quickly surmise that YOU are in the coffin, being buried alive.
You scream. "EDGAR!!! Don't do this!!!! Let me out and I'll leave! I'll never bother you or your friends ever again!"
"Soon you don't have to worry about that! Soon you will be my new friend! Just wait a couple days!"
You freak out. "EDGAR NOOOO! I DON'T WANT TO DIE! EDGARRRRRRR! I DON'T WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!!!!"
Through the darkness you hear Edgar speaking, muffled as he pours more dirt upon your coffin.
"You WILL be my friend. FOREVER."
Your breaths grow fainter as you sweat profusely. You will die, buried alive, suffocating in agony, pounding away at the coffin with your clenched fists to no avail. You go to hell and burn forever.
"I'm Edgar."
"Hi Edgar..."
"These are my friends. Why were you playing with my friends?"
"Well...Edgar.. I...I thought we could share."
He shakes his head violently.
"NO! They are MY friends! YOU CAN'T TAKE THEM FROM ME!" Edgar swings the shovel with incredible velocity, smacking you directly in the side of the head. Everything goes blurry and dark. You stumble and raise your arms to defend yourself. To your dismay, Edgar hits you again and again with the shovel, never missing his mark. The third strike knocks you out.
You awake to the sound of dirt being piled on a coffin. You are in complete darknness. You quickly surmise that YOU are in the coffin, being buried alive.
You scream. "EDGAR!!! Don't do this!!!! Let me out and I'll leave! I'll never bother you or your friends ever again!"
"Soon you don't have to worry about that! Soon you will be my new friend! Just wait a couple days!"
You freak out. "EDGAR NOOOO! I DON'T WANT TO DIE! EDGARRRRRRR! I DON'T WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!!!!"
Through the darkness you hear Edgar speaking, muffled as he pours more dirt upon your coffin.
"You WILL be my friend. FOREVER."
Your breaths grow fainter as you sweat profusely. You will die, buried alive, suffocating in agony, pounding away at the coffin with your clenched fists to no avail. You go to hell and burn forever.
