Hall of Infinite Doors

You tell them that you thought he stole your hubcap (you were in fact missing one) and that you had it when you came to the park.

They ask the kid about it and only find inconsistencies. He claims you said you were an undercover agent and he was afraid you were going to arrest him.

They decide the best course of action is to keep you there until the police come to sort things out.

No matter how this turns out, it doesn't look like you will be getting a child. In other words, you fail!
End Of Story