Harry Potter's Last Stand

You walk up several flights of stairs and reach the room Harry and Ron sleep in. You notice movement and see that they are not sleeping at all, but Ron has in fact moved to Harry's bed and they are involved in a deep intimate makeout session. They have not even noticed you entering. You decapitate a nearby sleeping student with your axe to get their attention and say "Am I interrupting your little fairymcfaggy kissy kiss party?"

Ron quickly grabs his wand and says, "Do not worry Harry I shall protect you" but when he goes to cast a spell with it, he realizes why they said not to use a wand as an anal dildo. The wand was broken in half in Harry's ass and is now useless. How shall you deal with him?