Hall of Infinite Doors

You walk through the freshman door and are transformed into a small awkward acne coated freshman boy. A couple of drunken senior varsity football players grab you and shove your head in the toilet and then proceed to anally rape you. When they are done they strangle you and hoist your body up on the flag pole. The police do not waste resources on an investigation because you are a freshman and don't count.
End Of Story