Dumber than Dumb: Stupider than Stupid

You choose English Made Simple. It's too complicated for you to read. You pick it up at some old, weird bookstore and steal it without getting noticed. Your snot is all over the pages of the book by the time you are able to complete a page and you are bored out of your mind. You fall unconscious trying to read it and your literary comprehension is too insufficient to get the linguistics of the book through your head to any proper level to understand what it's even trying to convey.

Your parents find you passed out and unconscious. It's April 27th. You are given a notice through your parents from the Stupid Instrumental Secondary School that you are to prove eligibility of sanity and sufficient understanding by May 15th or be sent to the Stupid Asylum for life. What are you to do to prepare?