The Thief's Tale

You walk into the museum with no problem. You had your brother Paul find you a uniform and had your friend Amelia make you a tour guide pass.
Nevertheless, the guard briefly stops you and growls, "I haven't seen you here before, and I never forget a face."
You reply quite chipper, "I'm new!"
The guard was quite put off by this cheerful attitude, and he demands to search your bag that you plan to store the painting in.
"Why would a tour guide like you need a backpack?"
Your mind goes completely blank.
" I uh ummm have....... stuff to put in it."
"Oh okay!" The guard cheerfully shrugs.
You are now exhausted and try to walk briskly away to find the precious piece of artwork without suspicion. You see a glimpse of the bright reds of "The First Breakfast" and venture closer.
Another tour guide yells, "You're too close! Back off! What did they teach you in training?!"
"I'm new," you whimper.
You have to make a split second decision