Dexter

Deep sleep...

You're snoring. A snot bubble inhales and exhales as you breathe heavily. Your musky breathe reaches your nostrils even in your state of unconsciousness. Your heavy head is positioned uncomfortably on your old keyboard, pressing down on the letter D. Even the blaring techno music you left on won't falter your state of rejuvenation from all the fun you had last night. You're having a pleasant dream about what you did to your rabbit buddy the other day.

"YOU HAVE: (1) NEW MESSAGE" Your computer practically shouts at you, probably because the keyboard fell asleep under the weight of your skull.

"Fuck."

You jerk awake, nearly toppling off your chair. Damn, you fell asleep on the "job" again. By job you mean hacking people's credit cards and luring them to your apartment for free food, being a spotted hyena and all.

You cringe as you look over the secret chat room you left on last night, reserved for you and your other hacker friends. There is a ridiculous amount of "D"s spamming up the screen.

Ghandi885: STOP SPAMMING THE MOTHERFUCKING CHAT!

Wolffy: I think he fell asleep at the keyboard...

EpixHaxor: lol wouldnt suprise me.. the dude never get s any sleep

Ghandi885: Lol.

Wolffy: Poor him.

You brush some of your blue dyed hair off the keyboard, before cautiously typing "Uh... sorry guys. I'm a bit groggy, I was having way too much fun last night."

Ghandi885: Pfft... glad to see you awake.

EpixHaxor: dude get some sleep. on a regular basis.

Wolffy: Our inboxes were going all like "You have (82) new messages" all night. It was irritating.

Dexter: Sorry Wolffy. But it's not my fault Gizmo's family is so fun to torment.

Ghandi885: You and your issues.

Dexter: But I mean... it's just so fun to force them to see me fucking him chained to a wall.

Ghandi885: That makes one of us.

Wolffy: Anyways, today we're going to destroy our target's malware defense system for good. Make sure you've got your equipment ready at 3:00.

Dexter: Got it.

EpixHaxor: now he goes off to fuck his toy bunny

Ghandi885: HAHAHAHAHA

That is, in fact, exactly what you have in mind, but you stick with a simple "Lay off guys." Then you close the chat.