Escape - Mansion!

Arrrr..... uuuhhhh....
You must have had too much to drink that last night out. You don't remember a thing besides getting into a fight with a brawny guy.
What's going on? You blink drearily and take in your surroundings.
You are in a vast, high-ceiling room. The floor is lush red carpet. The walls are polished wood with gold patterns set into them.
Strangely, there is not a single window or door.
Confused, you get to your feet and: