The escort of the prince.

Written by GraySparrow / PG: Parental Guidance Suggested / 6.75 (4 ratings) (4)
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Comments & Ratings

Author Rating Date Comment
apotheosis
apotheosis		 Aug 9, 2006
Not a terribly original idea, lacked depth and the ability to draw its reader in. Still, it was decently written and enjoyable for a few minutes. I look foward to some more detailed pieces of work.
by apotheosis on Aug 9, 2006
jeffisthebest
jeffisthebest		 Jul 28, 2006
For a first story, I suppose it's good.
by jeffisthebest on Jul 28, 2006
donteatpoop
donteatpoop		 Jul 3, 2006
This story has an excellent plotline. Really, that portion of the story is quite brilliant, it's been done many-a-time in fantasy stories, but never (to my knowledge) in an interactive format.

The problem is that it looks exactly like a plot outline. I'm not really feeling the stroy. Had the stroy started out actually describing the attack on the royal family, it would have added a lot to the story itself as well as a real sense of tension for the reader.

I recommend you edit in some details and reset these ratings, I think you'll find much higher scores if you do so. I look forward to seeing how this story turns out, and to what else you may put forth in the future.
by donteatpoop on Jul 3, 2006
westernjesta
westernjesta		 Jun 30, 2006
Jolly good show, sparrow. A good Idea for a story, but small rooms with little detail. I still liked it, good show.
by westernjesta on Jun 30, 2006

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