Try the new AI-powered Infinite Story.

My Knight in Shining Armor

Comments & Ratings

Author Rating Date Comment
umrahel
umrahel
Sep 23, 2012
Short and incomplete. If you did complete,it'd be at least 8 maybe more for at least making a gay IF (and the only one I could find on Inf Story no less.)
by umrahel on Sep 23, 2012
Storywriter
Storywriter
May 4, 2007
I think the key to good writing goes back to third grade show and tell. In this case you do a lot of telling, and hardly any showing. Show us how these people feel and what they do. Don't just tell us.
by Storywriter on May 4, 2007
apotheosis
apotheosis
Feb 27, 2007
It has real potential, and it deserves credit for being one of the only stories on this site if not the only story to tackle this topic maturely.
by apotheosis on Feb 27, 2007
donteatpoop
donteatpoop
Jul 28, 2005
You rated yourself a ten. I'd be a hypocrite if I condemed you for that. But other people get pissed when they see this type of thing.

Looking past the gay thing, which is something that future readers will hopefully be able to do, it is written quite well. As a suggestion though; you should seperate your paragraphs with two returns so that they can be distinguished from one another more easily by the reader.
by donteatpoop on Jul 28, 2005
dreamisle
dreamisle
Jul 11, 2005
by dreamisle on Jul 11, 2005

Rate Story