Girl Bullies-- field trip in NYC

Written by Joebwoy / NR: Not Rated /

(7)

Comments & Ratings

Author	Date	Comment
TheCandyMan	Apr 25, 2011	3.4? No way, It's a nicely wrote story. 6/10 :) by TheCandyMan on Apr 25, 2011
Calen	Mar 13, 2007	Somewhat entertaining, needs a lot of work though. by Calen on Mar 13, 2007
apotheosis	Dec 4, 2006	Needs work, relatively uninteresting, descriptive. Use literary techniques. It seems that you had the story in your mind but you have difficulty translating to the story. Still there was some semblance of effort so I will give it a 3. by apotheosis on Dec 4, 2006
donteatpoop	Sep 13, 2005	Such a pathetic attempt at a story. Joebwoy, you have style, but you lack any other dynamics. Here's my suggestion to you, should you ever come back to the site and read this; don't write anything until you have a good plot line. Also, if it's going to be a story about trying not to get beat up by a bunch of girls, label it as a comedy rather than an adventure. by donteatpoop on Sep 13, 2005
ZavuSilverlight	Feb 28, 2005	I thought the story was boring. The first 8-10 rooms it's just you in a f*cking line. Plus you piss me off by voting your stories 10 all the time. by ZavuSilverlight on Feb 28, 2005
Joebwoy	Feb 5, 2005	The storyline is da bomb and joe didn't even finish it yet by Joebwoy on Feb 5, 2005
jeffisthebest	Feb 4, 2005	It's a good idea...I guess. But it wasn't a good story. Really. Your first time, though. by jeffisthebest on Feb 4, 2005