Paradise Violated

Comments & Ratings

It seemed good at first but then it just seemed lazy.
by Madbrad200 on May 22, 2014
by Thickskullman on Jul 13, 2013
by Celvis on Aug 18, 2010
Another gem!

I like how you set up the option scheme. Very nice. You know, with the back stories being optional reading. You (the reader) can get as in depth as you want....or not. I'm sure you've done this with a few of your stories.

Sci-fi usually isn't my cup of tea, but you did a nice job here. All in all it was pretty original! And that's a hard thing to do with sci-fi.

Because it's pretty much all been said and done before. Anyway, great job!

You did it! Yay!!


Also, I've always liked the names of alien races and/or fantasy races you come up with.

Also, I think I'm falling in love with you. Shhhhh. Don't say a word.

Don't say a word.
by ChubbyTeletubby on Jun 7, 2009
This was one of the random stories pulled up when I discovered this site and the first I read, so EndMaster is directly responsible for getting me addicted. Paradise Violated is very obviously inspired by Warhammer 40k, and even though that's a setting I've never really been able to get into, here I was hooked immediately. (It helps that he provides a good deal of optional background info, that's something I'll have to keep in mind when I post my own work...) An excellent story all around.
by zee on Apr 7, 2009
by zee on Apr 5, 2009
I wasn't expecting such a well developed story but I was wrong. Other than a few lazy endings this was not that far from Ground Zero or Necromancer epicness. I give this a 9.
by urnam0 on Feb 20, 2009
by TacoNo1 on Aug 29, 2008
by scottmah on Jul 30, 2007
This story was a little bit difficult to get into at first, but I'm glad I stayed on-board with it because it became increasingly intriguing the more I read.

I really liked your use of background notes to flesh out the story more without burdening the less patient among your readers. I also never realized that my ex-boss was actually a Mazatt. Fascinating! My pet name for him was actually "Napoleonic little bastard", but "Mazatt" is much easier.

I like the mix of familiar military and Star Strek-y elements, but in a new and original scenario. I also appreciated some of the chilling parallels to our own current political realities.
by Vesnicie on Jun 8, 2007
Another excellent story End, but the style of writing bothered me. A lot of the language seemed casual... and I much prefer a stiff pretentious style of writing... damn AP English classes have me brainwashed. Anyway, great story, I just had to deduct a point due to the form the narration was delivered in... if that makes any sense...
by apotheosis on Feb 5, 2007
Loved it, a very primal science fiction.
by donteatpoop on Jan 25, 2007
by jeffisthebest on Jan 3, 2007

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