Animal Life

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This is pretty bad.

Animal perspective stories tend to be weak in the plot department, and this is no exception. Unfortunately it's also weak in the spelling, punctuation, and grammar department, and while it has quite a few 'pages', that doesn't count for much when they're each just a line or two long.

I'd recommend the author take time to get a better grasp on the basics of writing in English, and then when they're ready for a more serious attempt at a story, work on adding in more details and description, give their characters personality and depth and structure the whole thing around a more involving plot.
by mizal on May 2, 2016

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