The Villain Manifesto

"I have slaughtered this cleric with ease," you boast. "Join me, and I shall make your life just as easy."

Angry fire leaps in both their eyes simultaneously. "And just why would we join with the man who has killed our master?!?" they cry.

Mistaking them for passers-by is not nearly so deadly as the crossbow bolts they immediately fire at your unprotected chest. Apparently, being an infamous villain just wasn't in the cards for you.