TRASH

"Ah fuck it, Tina I'll be a bouncer, I don't feel like having to deal with people barking fucking orders at me." You say. Tina looks relieved; she probably figured you'd end up drinking more than you served if you were bartending. (And she's probably right)

"Okay honey, just stand by the door then, weed out anyone who looks like they're going to cause trouble, and if someone tries to get too grabby with one of the girls, come in like the riot squad and throw their asses out. You also collect the door fee."
"Sounds good to me."
"I have to get ready for my show now baby. Hey! This will be the first time you've ever seen it!"
"What the hell are you talking about? You've strip teased for me tons of times, don't you remember our first date?"
"Yeah, but you've never seen me at work! I'm really proud of MY dance; I bring something different than all those other skanks. This is so exciting! I feel like we're really sharing something new! I'm so happy you've decided to work here!"

Tina kisses you and then runs off like a humming bird in heat. This is getting really weird; you've NEVER seen Tina like this! She hasn't bitched at you once the moment you agreed to work here! That's gotta be some kind of record. You briefly entertain the idea that your Tina was abducted by space aliens and replaced by one of their own in some attempt to create a hybrid offspring to take over earth.

"Hey fuck face! You gonna let me in or what? I got fuckin' money over here that I wanna spend on some bitch! An' I don't wanna spend the night lookin' at your ugly hillbilly ass!" a young man shouts from behind the velvet rope.

Well back to reality…
« Go Back