Cody Christano: The Life of an American Scum Bucket
You ring the doorbell again and again to try to annoy them into answering the door.
The door opens suddenly and you are greeted by a large burly man wearing a black ski mask.
"Oh...shit." you state.
"Oh shit is right you annoying bastard." He grabs you by the shirt and pulls you inside kicking the door shut behind him. You struggle but he is vastly stronger, holding you tightly. He carries you into the living room then throws you onto the couch. He pulls out a revolver and trains it on you.
Looking around the living room you can see old Mr. Javoney is lying face first on the floor, his pants removed and a large rolling pin shoved in his rectum. A pool of blood is around his head. In the distance you can see the kitchen and Mrs. Javoney; she is hung upside down from the ceiling fan with a bungie cord, both her hands seem to have been cut off. A frozen look of grisly terror is on her pale face. A cold sweat begins to form on you.
"You had to keep ringing that damn bell didn't ya pal. Today ain't your lucky day." He cocks the revolver.
"Can you at least shove a rolling pin up my ass to so I don't feel like you murdered me like a punk? Ya know,put some artistic effort into it?" You don't know why you said it, but you did.
"Don't worry pal. I'm putting you face first in the toilet afterwards."
"Thanks." You reply
The ski mask burglar fires the revolver once, a bullet goes through your eye socket and kills you instantly. You go to hell and burn forever.
The door opens suddenly and you are greeted by a large burly man wearing a black ski mask.
"Oh...shit." you state.
"Oh shit is right you annoying bastard." He grabs you by the shirt and pulls you inside kicking the door shut behind him. You struggle but he is vastly stronger, holding you tightly. He carries you into the living room then throws you onto the couch. He pulls out a revolver and trains it on you.
Looking around the living room you can see old Mr. Javoney is lying face first on the floor, his pants removed and a large rolling pin shoved in his rectum. A pool of blood is around his head. In the distance you can see the kitchen and Mrs. Javoney; she is hung upside down from the ceiling fan with a bungie cord, both her hands seem to have been cut off. A frozen look of grisly terror is on her pale face. A cold sweat begins to form on you.
"You had to keep ringing that damn bell didn't ya pal. Today ain't your lucky day." He cocks the revolver.
"Can you at least shove a rolling pin up my ass to so I don't feel like you murdered me like a punk? Ya know,put some artistic effort into it?" You don't know why you said it, but you did.
"Don't worry pal. I'm putting you face first in the toilet afterwards."
"Thanks." You reply
The ski mask burglar fires the revolver once, a bullet goes through your eye socket and kills you instantly. You go to hell and burn forever.
