Hall of Infinite Doors

This seems to be a third scroll in the inebriated man's collection, over which he seems to have been getting progressively worse. It is titled "God's Failed Prototype"

Once again, I'm slightly inebriated, so if you don't appreciate my writing style in my uninhibited slightly retarded state I suggest you don't read the rest of this article. If you can see past the fact that honesty can be difficult to swallow and that I may make grammatical errors then I suggest you read on.

So, once again, I've gotten inebriated enough so that I can stop feeding myself bullshit for a few minutes. I mean, this isn't a common occurence, I stop feeding myself bullshit less often than I drink, though they are correlated, it is a biochemcial balance I must reach where I drink the right amount at the right rate to be lucid while not having inhibitions. While most people get more at ease socially in this state, I get less at ease, and this is why.

Most people use ethanol as a method of ignoring their prevalent social issues and indulging in the common fun time, if the term "fun time" makes sense. Me, on the other hand, only sees the flaws in humans more clearly when I am disinhibited. I can't imagine how I'd feel if I could get dishinibited without loosing luciditiy, because I feel like if this were to occur my negativity towards the current state of things might actually be overwhelming. Anyway, let us take what is. I've consumed lots of ethanol with mixures of glucose based subtances to mask taste and dilute its potency. This has allowed me to get to a level where I have futher solidified my beliefs. Human beings are just powerful and smart (though these mean essentially the same thing) enough to be able to ignore the truths that they percieve. By drinking I able able to eliminate by ability to ignore these truths without losing the ability to percieve these truths. There is a conclusion I come to.

Human beings are incredibly flawed. I am no better than anyone else. I am completely flawed as well. The disturbing part is how humans not only wallow in their imperfection but cling to it and define anyone who tries to improve the human form as a heretic and immoral character. Now I don't believe in God or any transcendent being, but for arguement's sake, lets say he does. This entity has not entered to help us in any recent time, and convenently not in any time where we could create reliable records that would say if something like his existence is true. Even still, people adamantly refuse any points I make about the flaws in humanity. Now this exists on a basic survival level, they will not believe that they are not "meant" or at least most fit to be here. But beyond that, humans have developed many sophisticated weapons to battle progress. Humanism is one of the code words that has been used to describe this progress, and while loving humans is important, many have come to take humanism as preserving the human form and preventing anyone from perverting it. With how irrational an weak this form is, why wouldn't someone greater up the resources necessary to improve it. I'm not advocating eugenics or any loss of free will, I'm just saying let us discard any conception that humans are perfect and you can't be better than that, and if people try to improve themselves and their offspring to transcend their humanity, let them. Even if they fail, we will learn so much it well help humanity in the long run.

Anyway, I may very well be ranting, so let me get to the point. I'm at the number 1 college in the country, not University, but college (though they would be close) and I have discovered even the students here are obsessed with pathetic minutia. They seem to think that everything boils down to race, socioeconomic status, sexual preference, and other shitty details that should matter what so ever if an indiviual is supporting a larger world view. In reality though, these details plus all of the subtle social rules I still have yet to understand. I still feel alone an alienated.

Since everyone else seemes to be enjoying themsevles and I am not it would lead me to believe that a lot of people are reaching for escapism while I am unable to reach this level so instead I obsess myself with social commentary and my feelings of alienation from society as a whole, or at least within the community I am a part of, which isn't ,much different than the whole because the William's token hard working apathy complex seems to be rampant.

Ultimately, I am the one with the issue, not everyone else, so I am the one who should be removed in order to balance the equation and make everyone else happy, but this isn't what will happen. I see room for improvement where no one else does. Everyone can be self critical, but am I the only one who views their species and sees only flaws and places where nature has so far failed. First off, altruisim is at a pathetically low state compared where it should be. Even selfishly, if humans were forward thinking, they would realize thbat if everyone was altruistic they would benefit in the long run. Also, no one set s trajectory for the scale of their life. They just drift chasing shallow goals that society has set for them. Futhermore, no one is troubled by this. No one is troubled by how banal our mating rituals have become, how corrupt our respective career markets have become, and if anyone has it isn't enough for them to act out. Once again, the only reasons I stay here and don't remove myself from the picutre is my close family, the production of media, promise of possible progress in the the future, and the support of a family, who, beyond just genetic ties, I truly love and respect. And this is what keeps me teathered to this world, this and my attraction to the opposte gender. Without these factors I'd leave, whether it be physically or mentally I really can't predict.

We need to improve humanity in innumerable ways. I don't know where to start, but making us healthier, thinner (hence heathlier) more fit and less prone to genetic diseases is a good start, but this could be misconstrued as basic upper level eugenics shift, when in reality thinks like altruism, fraternity, progress, trust and honesty were still important on some levels, but not on others. The religious forerunners had some things right, but they were to slow and not nearly enough aggressive, otherwise the Western Goths and Huns would've fallen like flies.

I don't know where I'm going with this whole drunken rant but I think my point was that you should only hang out and hook up with people you truly care about and like otherwise it just feels like a banal empty conquest and I think you should choose your your matches are because they are funny.

Fuck it, everyone I said before was also pretty flawed. My thesis is that the human being is a very flawed prototype and that there is obvious room for improvement. We should work slow enough so that we understand what we are doing and don't fuck anything up but we should be aiming to improve ourselves metnally and phyically otherwise humanity may lose the forward trajectory it needs to continue on. Ignore my possibly emo, depressing trinbutes and idle threats becauouse now his armies mean buisness. What am I saying, I'm getting disjointed thoughts. I'm drunk and this post doesn't make a whole lot of sense so I think fo rposterity I will keep this post and I will just type the rest as I have been for the past five sentencesn weith my eyes closthes so that I give you an interesting story. Huamns are flawed and neeed to be improved and a lot fo people think the form is perefect and they are wake beacuse it is still very elementary.
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