Snoopy

YAY US! This story brought everyone at Rush Hour closer together, and I had fun adding on to it. We worked really hard, especially you, and it's awesome! :-)

WOW! Go you! I never knew you had such a big vocabulary! You make it sound like someone my age is writing this story! Good Work! You might want to consider tying up the loose ends though. Make a whole bunch of possibilities so that people can keep reading it. Can't wait for more! :-)

OK. This needs some work. Inuyasha is ONE word, and it's "Blades of Blood" not "Claws of Blood". Also, your verbs are messed up. You're switching from past to present tense, and it makes the story hard to follow. I think that this story needs a major update. No offense, but I really don't think you put a lot of heart into this. I mean, you can even see it in some of the choices. You can't be so blunt. Add a little mystery to your words, don't just throw them out there. It causes the readers to lose interest. Play with it a little. Like, just when a reader thinks a certain thing is going to happen, turn it around, so that it's the complete opposite of what was expected. It might be easier just to slap a story together, but that doesn't always make it the best choice. You want people to enjoy your story. Don't just write something down and be done with it, because people can see right through that. If your heart's not in your work, then there's no point in writing. If you don't love what you write then go back to the drawing board. Don't just say,"OK I guess this is just one of my 'blah' pages." No, you can't do that. Especially when you're dealing with something as exciting as Inuyasha. Make each page dynamic. Set a standard for your writing. If you don't feel that it's your best, then don't post it on the site. It's as simple as that. Just get it together.

YAY FOR KSCHLEE!!! I love it! It has a lot of choices and I really enjoyed seeing where they would take me throughout the story. It was really fun to experience. GO YOU!!!