Extend the Story - Add a Room

Man I... well... I don't know where to start.

IT all happened this morning when I picked up this hitchhiker and... wait no... it started when these guys held me up and tried to carjack me... and... no... it was this derranged clown who tried to pants me and I was drinking this orange... no... I got it!

HE threatened to rape me.
Bingo. THe cops are always on your side if someoen was gonna rape you. They believe your story(s) or just aren't sure what to believe since there's a terrorist in your car and he needs to go "bye-bye" anyway.

They turn your car into swiss cheese and the terrorist explodes from his TNT in a form of firework unnexplainable except if you watch CNN every morning for the last 5 years.

Goodbye terrorist. Goodbye Taxi Civic...

The good news is that the police hand over $5,000 for the turn in of a wanted felon and they thank you for a job well done. They want to make you an honorary member of the force and you'll be able to do ride-alongs for a month, and then drive your own squad car.

There's a catch though. They want you to patrol the most ghetto of ghetto's: Ghettoville U.S.A.

You'r ehappy with the 5 grand and use it to buy a newer Honda Civic with better gas milleage and no cool bowling trophy, which is equally depressing as getting more mileage.

Now what to do...

Stick with Safeway, they are SAFE, as it suggests in the name