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The Teatime Of Infinity by Usoki
Will pops the crumpet into his mouth, but almost immediately regrets it. It is very stale; almost as if it has been around for years. We know that to be true, but hey. Give the guy a break.

As soon as Will swallows, a bizarre feeling starts in his gut. The tingle of magic spreads throughout his body, first up and down his throat, then throughout his entire body. As magic courses in his veins, his bowels begin to rumble madly. He sinks on his knees in pain, and lets one rip. The sound of magic lasts for at least five seconds, followed immediately by the stench of magic.

Feeling much better, Will examines himself and finds...
He now has complete control of the elements.
End Of Story

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