Godly Reader

You have no practice, so you accidentally trigger an alarm and call the police on yourself. You are arrested for an entire year, but try to break out during that time, so you end up getting a life sentence.
The Author comes to visit from time to time, but only annoys you and you've tried using your so-called "godly" power to free yourself, but it doesn't help in the slightest.
You spend the rest of your time in the story sitting in your cell.








BONUS:
You miss fried chicken.