Hall of Infinite Doors

You go to the most esteemed University in philosophy, a prominent private school and rack up a debt of $183,000. Unfortunately they did not give you any financial aid. Now that you are 183k in the hole you go out to find a job. Turns out the only thing you can do with a philosophy degree is become a philosopher... and surprisingly they are not in high demand. You try to write out a few books but no one is willing to publish them and you end up sitting in your basement in front of a typewriter smoking a whole lot of pot and not getting much accomplished. You end up racking up another $70,000 debt on living expenses, mainly food and pot since you have stopped showering. Publishers put your phone on the block list and you give up hope of ever being a published author. Soon the bank comes looking for payments on your several hundred thousand dollar debts and when you cannot pay them you are sent to debtors prison. Debtors prison is a prison ship in New Jersey where you are raped by other inmates and eaten alive by giant mutant rats also known as citizens of New Jersey.